IJS

Reunion after SO many years.  A beautiful moment.

So many emotions.

Four hours heart to heart.

Two souls finding coordinates in the geometry of life...

Parting again...too soon.  A hug that lingered so beautifully long...you held tight, released markedly last.  Melt.

Infatuated

Besotted.

Befuddled.

Tears.  More tears.  Yearning, longing.  Ridiculous!  Silly old middle age woman.

OK...Cold turkey.  No more yearning.  No more reading - and re-reading - your texts.  No future, no use.  So many miles between.  Move on.

And then?

A text from you...TILT.  Me:  Electric.  Effusive.  Back on!  Screw the 'rules'!

Texts continue.  Months pass.  Another reunion planned.

Together again.  I sense a bit of anxiousness.  I fear I induce nervousness.

Awkwardness (me) at the theater.  Loses something when you have to repeat a playful intimation.  I am slow on the uptake.  Out of practice or simply not thinking you could be flirting with me.  Always thought you were out of my league.

Still do.

Two quick sweet kisses stolen on Broadway.  Looking up into your face - surreal.  A gazillion people swarming the Square on a Saturday night -- at that moment no one there but us.  Why oh why didn't I kiss you back????

The crew all together.  Table of six.  If I could write the script, my whole world - right at that table.

Another parting.  No hugs this time.  Anxiety.  Doubt.

I understand.  I do.  A lot alike.  Same fabric of interwoven melancholy, fears, reservations.  But with our experiences in common maybe...

A chance is all it could take.  JUMP.  I have a feeling.  I have a childlike enthusiasm to just let go and go with it.

No need to be an island.  Two together lessen the load. Your dreams and ambitions I wholeheartedly support and RESPECT.  You.are.amazing and I have loved learning about your journey thus far.  You are so different from what I am used to because you are not lazy, you are not negative and even with all the shit you've gone through in your life, your attitude and demeanor is NOT one of 'oh poor pitiful me'.

That in itself is SO welcome and refreshing to me!

Not asking for a betrothal...just want to maybe explore the possibility of getting closer??  Somewhat scary...I know.

But life is so much better shared. 

So how are you Dollface?

Do you think of me?  I think of you...often. 

I think you could be - become - remain - someone significant in my life.

All this is marginally crazy, I know...

But the fact remains that...

I...

simply...

adore you...IJS